February 8

     Finally, information from the black hole.  After nearly 5 weeks, He spoke to me today.  The conversation lasted about maybe a minute -- He was on a speaker phone with His "family" psychiatrist, and I guess you could say there was an agenda.  The gist being He will be leaving said facility in six days; His sister will be arriving and will help Him find a place to live; He will be seeking a divorce from me; He wants no contact with me.  Well, that's that.  I cannot help to wonder how somehow, He has turned Himself into some sort of victim here.  I must say, I was a bit stunned.  I was actually expecting, well, an apology.  For ... anything, everything, making my life hell, all the horrible things He has said and done.  Hmmm.  Didn't come.  No question about how we were, how I've been taking care of absolutely everything while he's been taking His little, shall I say, rest.  Heck, I'm exhausted.  Wonder if they have a spare room.  I could use some Tai Chi.  And I'm still sad about my fallen tree.  Mauricio finally showed up today and chop chop chop.  It's all gone.  No more beautiful tree; not even a beautiful fallen tree.  It's now just gone.  I actually think that upset more than anything else today, losing that tree.  Must be time to move on.  The tree did...